Sunday, November 28, 2010

“…He puts a song of praise in this heart of mine”

There is a song that we sometimes sing during the worship time at our church. The words are pretty simple, but extremely profound…God is good, all the time…

In this world where there is so much hurt, pain and uncertainty it can sometimes be hard to remember that God is good ALL the time but he is good ALL THE TIME. He may not act in ways that we as humans understand or appreciate but God has a plan for each of our lives and I believe that if I trust God with all of my heart that he will guide me in the direction that my life needs to go.

As bad as this sounds, over the past few months I have found it increasingly difficult to trust in the plan that God has for me because in my eyes this plan included a lot of uncertainty related to living situations and job stress. Especially during the month of November I have found myself complaining ALOT about my job and questioning God about how much patience he expected me to have related to where we were going to live upon the arrival of our son. During those moments of questioning and even now I feel guilty for my thoughts and feelings because I know that there are people all over dealing with problems much larger and much more complex than my own but my weak nature just wouldn’t allow me to “Let Go and Let God”. I was worried, nervous, confused, and frankly annoyed that I was having to wait at what seemed to be a never ending curve in the road – not knowing what lay around the next bend. I feel bad for these feelings, I know they are not good to have but I would be lying if I said that over the past two months I have been nothing but calm and peaceful about the uncertainty of our future.

Thankfully, God IS good ALL the time, even when I am not deserving (and when am I ever deserving) of his goodness and am arrogant enough to question his timing. We have been given an opportunity to move in to the home that we have a contract on to buy even though the contract is on hold due to the foreclosure crisis. I am beyond thankful for the opportunity to be able to move in our house, organize and “nest” before John Brooks is born. Like I said there are people all over dealing with situations much larger and much more complex si than what I have faced and I hope that I don’t sound as if I think my situation is at all in the same category as some of the tough stuff that people experience because I don’t believe that it is at all as big. But, in my own little world, this experience has had a strong affect on both Ben and me and it is something that I believe will strengthen our faith in the Lord.

God has heard my prayers to him and has answered them in his perfect timing. What a great lesson for me to learn to have faith and patience and trust in the Lord because he is Good ALL the Time.

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